By Rusty Aldridge
Special to the Elmore/Autauga News
Editor’s Note: Very special : )
Top Photo: Local artist Judie Hooks painted the portrait of one of the two Roosters inhabiting downtown Wetumpka.
How do you get out of this chicken outfit? Or rather, where did that chicken come from?
Sarah Stephens has published my “Short Riffs” column in the Elmore/Autauga News for several years, and she has even sent me out on assignment a couple of times to get pictures and talk to the people making the news. I enjoy it! It gives me something to do and I like to think it helps get the word out to our community.
Recently, Sarah gave me a very serious challenge; write a story that only I could write. A story that people have been asking for…a story that would be read over and over, printed off and hung on the refrigerator door… passed down from generation to generation! A story, that in this digital world we live in, would go viral and bust the internet wide open, sending the Kardashians spiraling through space and falling into the nearest black hole, never to be seen or heard from again… along with almost all cute cat videos.
There was something going on in my home town of Wetumpka, Alabama…something so strange and unusual that when people heard about it, they said half aloud, “My goodness! That IS strange and unusual!” Then she told me what it was:
There is a rooster living near the public library in Wetumpka!
I was aghast! Wetumpka has a library?
Now you see, I have to stop here and apologize…I worked a few years as a stand-up comedian and did morning radio for nearly a quarter century. When you come upon a joke like that and you’ve got my credentials, you have to do the joke! It’s kind of like if you’re a medical professional and you’re out driving and you come upon an accident…you have to stop! I know Wetumpka has a wonderful library and you should visit it soon…but, I digress…
I was aghast! There’s a rooster living near the public library in Wetumpka? There are so many questions!
Where did he come from?
How did he get there?
What’s his name?
Does he have a library card?
Does Jerry Willis know about this?
So many questions! And the editor in chief of The Elmore/Autauga News was not afraid! She was not afraid to step up and send one of her most trusted lackeys to go out and get to the bottom of this story…and like any good journalist, I stepped into the turbulent waters to get to the truth…and true to form, when I hit those waters, I went straight to the bottom!
Day 1—Friday, 1:45 pm
I was in the fair city of Wetumpka where I was wrapping up a trip to a large, national retail store and noshing on a big ol’ fat burger, some fries, and negating all the calories with a big diet belly washer. It was at this time, as I turned onto Wharf Street, I decided to make first contact. I slowed down to a pedestrian safe 5 mph and scanned the front of the library. It appeared to be closed. Not unusual, I thought. Social distancing, masks, the Chinese virus. I just chalked it up to people playing it safe. No people in sight…and no rooster…
1:50 pm
I decide to pull down toward the boat ramp, make a U-turn, and come back up to take a closer look. It wasn’t too cold that day so I had the car window down. I maneuvered the vehicle to just left of the entrance to the Rumbling Waters Art Gallery and Studio, then I heard it! An ear splitting, earth shattering, somewhere near 90 decibel…COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO!!!
1:51 pm
First contact!!!
One of the photos I have included with this story speaks volumes! Look at it and you will see the rooster. Just below him, you’ll see some sort of natural gas apparatus. I took this photo myself and did not notice until later the squirrel sitting on top of it. In an attempt to coax the rooster closer, I tossed out a handful of those greasy fries I had been eating. That’s when I noticed the squirrel. He was off that pipe and on those fries like ugly an ugly gorilla! Then he was up that sketchy looking tree you see on the right. The rooster never made a move. I guess he knew better than to eat those greasy fries!
As I said before, I did not notice the squirrel at first. Later, as I was studying the picture more closely, and I made a fowl discovery. Not only is there a crowing rooster and a felonious tree rat living on Wharf Street, well, look behind the rooster…that’s right…a lady chicken! “Wetumpka’s living near the library rooster” has a girlfriend!
2:30 pm
I am home and excited about my discovery! I located the source of my story in record time and found out so many things: there is a rooster living near the library in Wetumpka, his buddy the squirrel is stealing him blind, and in the words of Ray Charles, he’s got a woman! The next thing I want to know is what is his name? I turned to the place where you can ask questions and get insightful answers from some very wise and thoughtful people. Facebook.
“Hey FB friends! There’s a rooster living near the library in Wetumpka!! Anybody know his name?”
The answers started rolling in…
Cogburn…Roho…Road Island Red…Foghorn…Chicken Little…KFC…Brewster…Sunday Dinner, and my personal favorite, Epstein Didn’t Kill Himself. Okay, Facebook was a bad idea. This needs the personal touch!
Day—2 Monday about 9 am
From the safety of my luxurious Man Cave, I placed a call to the Wetumpka Public Library. I told the nice lady who answered who I was and what I was up to and she immediately connected me with library director Susan Hayes. It turns out Susan had all the information.
The rooster showed up at the library about a month after the miracle tornado of 2019. I call it a “miracle” because even though there was a great deal of damage, not one life was lost. I guess you could say the rooster just blew into town!
I mentioned names earlier. Susan had a couple more I did not think of – Gregory Peck and Russell Crow. But the strange thing is, none of the names stuck. I guess you could call him Clint Eastwood because, according to Susan, he is the rooster with no name.
Now here are some more fun fowl facts…
We have alreadyestablished that the rooster has a girlfriend. On Friday March 13th 2020, it was discovered that 14 little chicks were also living near the library! Laurie Wes Weldon, the county 4-H representative, took the chicks and helped to raise them and re-home them…but there are more surprises!
Our no name rooster friend is not our only poultry pal in the area. A few yards away in Gold Star Park exists another rooster and hen duo! Susan Hayes and the folks at the library have dubbed them the “A Team” and the “B Team.” I understand that the boundary lines are marked and strictly observed. The “A” team is working the library and the “B” team rules the park.
About every 90 days Susan makes a trip down to the farm center and picks up a 50lb. bag of cracked corn. Between that and what visitors offer, the two teams fare pretty well.
Local artist Judie Hooks felt inspired and now rooster “A” is immortalized on canvas. The painting can be seen hanging in the library. When asked why she painted a portrait of the “A” rooster, Judie said “He was more colorful…” However, Rooster “B” could not be reached for comment.
That is the story of Wetumpka’s roosters, hens and chicks. The story of the devil ducks down by the boat ramp, the ones that attack you when you’re trying to feed them, well that is for another day. It just goes to show how, with so much going on in a small town (HGTV), sometimes the little mysteries going on behind the scenes are the ones that make you smile.
But there is one other thing. Library director Susan Hayes told me another story. She gets the cracked corn for the chickens from the farm center. Bobby usually gets her order together for her and loads it into her car. However, on one recent trip Bobby was off work and James (Jimmy) helped her. When the manager explained the situation, Susan was fine with it. The conversation went something like this:
Manager: Jimmy cracked the corn…
Susan: I don’t care…
Stick around for the next show…
Make sure to tip your waitress…
I’ll be here all weekend…
From the EAN – Rusty Aldridge is a veteran radio show host, definitely a comedian, and one of our favorite people. We refer to him as our Man About Wetumpka Down. And he is more colorful than any Rooster.
